Remember a few weeks ago when I told you about my second home? The one in Boston, on Comm Ave, with a balcony that’s perfect for sipping cocktails? You know, the second home that doesn’t exist but is a figment of my future imagination?
Well, do you want to hear how we’ll be achieving that second home?
The graph below shows our secret.
Don’t worry, nothing’s wrong with your browser. Our secret is, there is no answer.
You see, ever since I turned 21 and entered into the real world, I’ve had this habit of looking at my life with a big empty hole in the middle.
I see me in the beginning (which is present day), clueless about life and where it’s going. Then I see me in the end (the future), basking in the fruits of my great successes.
And as the years since 21 have melted into 31 (or close enough), I still find myself looking at life this way:
Present……..Big Empty Hole……..Future of Riches.
My Big Empty Hole could also be called “My Next Big Thing.” Or, the unknown entity that will shift the tides of my life.
The invention that will make me my millions.
The song I write that’ll be picked up by Justin Bieber and turn me into a gazzillionaire.
The modeling agent that’ll see me in Starbucks and want to make me the new face of Calvin Klein and I won’t even have to pose in my underwear.
You get the point.
By the way, I’ve never actually invented anything. I’ve never written a song from beginning to end, and, um, I don’t think Calvin Klein does those underwear billboards anymore. But if they did, I think that one would still be viable.
As a child I must have read too many fairy tales about the princess who went from shab to fab just by being in the right place at the right time.
I also heard too many real-life stories of people poofing into riches during my dreamy adolescent years.
For instance, I knew a girl in middle school who’s dad invented the medical air evacuation helicopter…or the concept of it, or something. Either way, they were loaded.
Then there was Edward Furlong, the fresh-faced, H-O-T (by 7th grade girl standards) actor in Terminator 2 who was discovered by a talent agent as he was minding his own business in a local community center. If it could happen to Eddie, couldn’t it happen to me too?
But guess what, life doesn’t happen that way (sorry, 7th grade me).
About a year ago I entered a contest. Entering required a lot of hard work and sleepless nights, and totally went against all common sense. But adrenaline and a general feeling of “this is meant to be” kept me moving forward. I entered the contest thinking A) I would win, and B) it would put me on the map, the city of Me, with a pin stuck in me for all to see.
I actually didn’t even make it past the first round. But I still believe it was meant to be, because it taught me to stop putting such unrealistic expectations on trivial events.
And riches (or fame, or success, or your face on a Calvin Klein billboard) rarely come from one isolated event. Even if it may seem so for others.
Instead, they come from hard work and a series of small steps – some successful, some tripped by rejection and failure.
A second home in Boston, though probably a long shot, could be obtained with planning, creativity, hard work – those small steps. Basically, by filling that Big Empty Hole with something tangible…or at least, by writing some songs or something.
November 5, 2010 at 9:00 AM
I refreshed my browser 3 or 4 times before I actually read this, nicely played.
The dream is step one. With the proper motivation, dedication, and all the other ‘-ations’ the dream is achieved.
And then sometimes you get lucky :).
November 7, 2010 at 6:55 PM
Lol. The dream is indeed the first step. I am in the only quiet room in our small home and I can hear the shouts of 3 of our 4 children (#4 is sleeping and only 2 months old). I am in a very thought provoking time in our lives. We have been beseiged by that all-too-common thing of an upside-down house and we are in the process of trying to get rid of said house. It has been all too consuming for me lately and it really makes you think about that big hole in the middle phase. Our kids are 5, 3, 2, and 2 months respectively and if I am not careful I could definitely miss these days while we are waiting g to get to Point B. I am going to try to give more of the control to someone higher up and do what I can, as best I can. Because that is all I can do.
November 9, 2010 at 2:55 AM
What a great article. I grew up about 45 minutes from Boston and I know exactly where you mean. It’s one of the cutest places on earth. Coincidentally, when I graduated from college, I thought I’d eventually end up in Boston. I’d just be at my first job for a couple of years then move there. It never happened because there came a point where I didn’t want to downgrade my lifestyle to live in a MUCH higher cost of living area. Yeah, I literally can live in Boston if I want. I could theoretically afford it, but I’d lose my yard, my savings, my parking spot, and about 1000 square feet of living space.
I think the key to your article is that your life is where it is because of the choices you make. If you really wanted to work a gazillion hours trying to make your first million, you could probably do it. But is it really worth sacrificing everything else in your life so that you can get rich? If not, than don’t beat yourself up over it.
Most people put years of their life on hold to get a business running. I’m sure helicopter guy didn’t have much of a home life for a long time. You should’ve asked loaded friend if she ever saw her dad or if he was always working. My view of a rich executive is that they LOVE the power, they are never home and are consumed by their jobs. Most songwriters spend years and decades broke before they have their first hit. Most models are rejected hundreds of times on go-see’s for the most random of reasons before they even get one jig.
I hope I’m not being a negative nelly here, but I truly believe that anyone can achieve their dreams. It’s just that most people don’t want to put the blood, sweat and tears in to get there.
Very thought provoking post as you can see from my super long comment. Thanks.
November 9, 2010 at 7:17 AM
You’re right. Even though my “real life examples” looked like people hopped into money with minimal effort, that is never the case. It can take many many years of hard work and rejection. But the good thing is the rejection helps us learn what we did wrong, so we can get back up and try again. The “One Thing” view of life is not a very good one. It takes many things. And, dreams change as we change.
November 9, 2010 at 12:48 PM
Great comment, First Gen! I bet it would make a good blog post too. :)